Sometimes in life we can’t help what goes on around us and it leaves us in a state where we become low or just try to cover it up. I once said before that I felt that most people wear a mask to protect what they really feel like and have to keep it on to hide what’s really going on. Am I doing the same now? No not at all, I’m just working out what’s going on and how to handle the situation better. Death is never easy and the fact that this is now number 6 leaves me wondering how much more I can take. One every month so far and yet all I wish is for things to get better and not worst. In some cases we have to go through a bad spot to realise what really counts around us. But it feels so weird now. In the sense that … I’m not feeling down and out but I’m a little … I dunno how to explain it. Regardless I know my friends will be there if I do breakdown but I don’t see that happening right now at all. Life can be short and sometimes we take it for granted the things we have around us. Whatever your reason for committing suicide, I respect it but I really wish I knew why you did it.