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Back again

Dear world I disappeared without much warning but I needed that break. I needed to get away from the few things that were getting to me. I took on too much and ending up doing more damage to myself than realised. I only have myself to blame for it but now I understand myself a bit better. So what have I been up to? Well… Quite a bit really. I’ll start with the good news, I have a partner now and I’m happy as can be! It’s been a long time coming and its true, good things do come to those who wait. We have been together since the end of November and things have been going well. I have been in and out of work again but I think it’s for the better. Sometimes you gotta go through each one and find what it is you feel happy doing. But when it comes to those moments where you wake up and you feel angry yet you have no idea why… Leave the job. All I can do is hope I’m accepted into my dream job next month and can start it. I have been begging to be a peer support worker and now the chance for a paid one is here, I’m taking it. I know it may not be easy but I have to do this. It’s been what I wanted to do for so long! Apart from that… Well I have been writing new lyrics here and there. Not many but just whatever I felt. But what about my other blog? Am I gonna go back to it? Maybe. I just feel so drained from doing it that I don’t want to rush back in. I honestly thought it would be easy but then it turns into a strain and you just feel like it is another job. That’s one of the main reasons why I stopped. If it is something you enjoy and do for fun then don’t let it take over your life. For me that is definitely not something I want to do right now. If I can get a helping hand then that’s okay. While my health is still not great I’ll be taking it easy for now on but I’m hoping you are all okay and doing well!

Love Anton


Maybe …

I’m wondering if me speaking my mind made things worst for you. What if I just let things carry on would you be happier? Am I to blame for you been the way you are because I just feel like … I have hurt you. Was there no other way or was this just me being selfish? This feeling inside of me has blossomed out and spread over to you but what if it was the wrong way.

Bye Bye Miss American Pie …

So the other day I showed my friend Lauren around London. Didn’t spend much together but it was time worth spending either way. She wanted to go Tower Bridge and go on a boat ride. Of course I didn’t mind so much and the fact that I could do it was pretty cool. Me and Lauren went to meet at Elephant and castle a place close to both of us. Only problem since it has more than one exit, you can kinda get lost. Must of spent 15 minutes trying to find each other. I forgot to tell her what I would be wearing but knew what she was wearing which was all good. Before I went to meet I wanted to make her smile so went into a shop and tried to get a single rose. Problem was the shop keeper wanted me to buy a full packet and I told him clearly this is like asking for a box of cigs when I don’t need it!

When we finally did see each other Lauren was across the street so I looked around and try to find a way to get to her. Instead of taking the short route which was to my right, I took the long ass route to my left. Completely out of her sight but was glad so this way I could now surprise her. I went behind her and put the rose right in front of her and she yelled Oh My Gooooooood! Hee hee it was cool hearing her say that and seeing the big smile on her face.